Indians and Polish

|There were two Indians and a Polish fellow walking along together in the desert, when, all of a sudden, one of the Indians took off and ran up a hill to the mouth of a cave. He stopped and hollered into the cave… “Woooooo! Woooooo! Woooooo!” and then listened very closely until he heard the […]

Texan’s guide to life

|Never squat with yer spurs on. There’s two theories to arguin’ with a woman; neither one works. Don’t worry about bitin’ off more than you can chew, your mouth is probably a whole lot bigger’n you think. If you get to thinkin’ you’re a person of some influence, try orderin’ somebody else’s dog around. Never […]

Had any accidents?

|The cowboy was trying to buy a health insurance policy. The insurance agent was going down the list of standard questions.”Ever have an accident?””Nope, nary a one.””None? You’ve never had any accidents.””Nope. Ain’t never had one. Never.””Well, you said on this form you were bit by a snake once. Wouldn’t you consider that an accident?””Heck, […]

Stagecoach surprise

|I had a dream the other night. I was in the old West riding in a stagecoach. Suddenly, a man riding a horse pulls up to the left side of the stagecoach, and a riderless horse pulls up on the right.The man leans down, pulls open the door, and jumps off his horse into the […]

Learn it by listening

|Two cowboys come upon an Indian lying on his stomach with his ear to the ground. One of the cowboys stops and says to the other, “You see that Indian?””Yeah,” says the other cowboy.”Look,” says the first one, “he’s listening to the ground. He can hear things for miles in any direction.”Just then the Indian […]

Texan with a new car

|Three cowboys were hanging out in the bunkhouse. “I know that smart aleck Tex,” said the first. “He’s going to start bragging about that new foreign car he bought as soon as he gets back.” “Not Tex,” the second cowboy replied. “He’ll always be just a good ol’ boy. When he walks in, I’m sure […]

Is that your horse?

|The Lone Ranger and Tonto walked into a bar one day and sat down to drink a beer. After a few minutes, a big tall cowboy walked in and said, “Who owns the big white horse outside?” The Lone Ranger stood up, hitched his gunbelt, and said, “I do. Why?” The cowboy looked at the […]

Solve Indian puzzles

|An Indian chief had three wives, each of whom was pregnant. The first gave birth to a boy. The chief was so elated he built her a teepee made of deer hide. A few days later, the second gave birth, also to a boy. The chief was very happy. He built her a teepee made […]

You are in trouble

|An evil Atheist explorer in the deepest Amazon suddenly finds himself surrounded by a bloodthirsty group of natives. Upon surveying the situation, he says quietly to himself “Oh God, I’m screwed!!!!!.” There is a ray of light from heaven and a voice booms out: “No, you are NOT screwed. Pick up that stone at your […]